Maxly’s Trip; Mommy’s Memory Lane

Nos-tal-gia noun: a strong desire or sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time in one’s life.

 

Some people will argue that there are blinding effects of nostalgia / being nostalgic. That perhaps it potentially removes rough edges from bad parts of the good old days. Eh, that’s crap to me. I was blessed enough to have a good no great childhood, with loving parents, fond memories and awesome traditions. Traditions that were timeless and I’m eager to pass down to my own daughter. Traditions are traditions for a reason and they’re meant to remain practiced throughout time. Growing up my family had the classic customs as most people do but we also had our own “mash ups” that my parents invented as well. Rituals that were done so many times that essentially they became our heritage.

Let’s take a trip down my memory lane.

The Penny Fairy. The Penny Fairy came and visited me every year on my birthday and leave money underneath the dinner plate. She would leave a penny for every year of your age plus an additional penny for good luck – as someone would do with placing an extra candles on ones birthday cake. The catch was she would only come if we were celebrating the birthday dinner at home opposed to going out to eat. Knowing I would fall for it, my damn parents were (and still are) so clever… always finding ways to save money haha. I cannot wait to do this with Maxly on her first birthday. Kids love shiny things and kids love money. That little girl is going to love those two pennies. Such a fun and unique thing to create within the household!

English Muffin Pizza. My dads specialty. It was always a treat when he made these scrumptious delicacies because it meant my mom was out for the night or out of town. Still to this day they are SO GOOD. He’ll have to pass it on to my fiance so it’ll be something special for him and Maxly to do if I’m out for the night or out of town. And if not pizza (although we are a family of pizzaholics) there will be some special meal in place that the two will bond over for those special occasions!

Valentines Day. My mother always got me and my sister gifts on Valentines Day!Nothing major but always something nice and thoughtful. Even at 26 years old my mother still does. Just as a reminder that she loves us and she always will. Valentines Day is not just about having a boyfriend or a girlfriend, or a husband or a wife. We were always taught that Valentines Day is clearly just about love all around. As a teenager I especially liked this tradition because if I was feeling down for a boy not liking me or something stupid my mom always picked me up by gifting me a little something. I will do the same for my daughter. I hope it’s as meaningful to her as it always was to me and it helps build Maxly’s self love.

Keep the jokes running. I’ve touched on this topic before a couple of times in some of my previous posts but I’ll say it again because it never gets old… Like her mother (me), Maxly has lower back dimples. And my parents used to (and still do say) “well you know what those dimples really mean right? Like how you got them?” If you guys are curious as to what the answer is, it’s this…knobs. Yup. Just call me a Conehead. I was told over and over when I was little that I had knobs on my lower back like the Coneheads but they just happened to fall off. Hence the dimples. What?! Haha. I truly believed them for so long. But I also though gullible wasn’t in the dictionary. Hey why have kids if you can’t mess with them right?

Mommy Dearest. Remember my post recently about watching potentially “inappropriate” movies for my young self due to having young parents? (I turned out fine.) Well Mommy Dearest may have been one of those movies but I loved it nonetheless. Along with being one of the most quotable movies out there it’s also a great reminder on how great of a mother I was blessed with. She never forgot to remind me of that! Whenever I thought she was being mean and unfair she would turn around and say “do you want me to be mommy dearest?!” NOPE. And I intend to do the same with Miss Maxly. It’s a “fun” yet affective method to respect your mom.

A comfy Christmas. Always staying in our jammies was and is a long lasting belief. I was taught that there’s no need to dress up, and bounce around from others people’s homes just to “make an appearance” because of the holiday. No. My mother and father always cherished Christmas as our day off together with the whole family. You stay at home, and be with your kids. You be cozy together, watch the 24 hours Christmas Story marathon, enjoying presents and enjoying presence.

We had so many more customs, beliefs, rituals, nostalgia…whatever you want to call it, they’re our family traditions. And family traditions are so important. They’re fun, unique and keep life interesting. I cannot wait to create a fun and memorable childhood for my daughter like my parents did for me.

The Let Down; How The New Netflix Series Lifts Moms Up

Newly released to Netflix, Australian Productions presents us with The Let Down.  A raw comedy series with powerful insight to the “Twilight Zone period of becoming a new parent”, specifically for new mom Audrey (depicted by Alison Bell). Along with Audrey losing her identity outside of being a mom, sleep deprivation. struggling to breastfeed – she also lacks support from her partner Jeremy (casted by Duncan Fellows), her mother and her parentless friends. This series doesn’t portrays motherhood as “The Holy Grail” as it’s normally seen. This is the kind of show that will bring you right back down to Earth. As a recent first time Mom myself, I absolutely loved and binged this show. The Australian Comedy Series is full of such relatable raw moments and underlying humor.

Episode one opens dark, it’s late night, in a park. With poor Mombie Audrey (yes, Mombie, a “mom zombie“) trying to sleep in her parked car after driving around her (now) sleeping two month old baby Stevie. Just as she doses off she gets a knock on her window from a drug dealer who tells her to get out of his office. Since poor Stevie doesn’t sleep well at night it’s a reoccurring thing, driving through the park, that Aud and the drug dealer cross paths so much, they develop a quirky bond throughout the episodes.

Poor Audrey just fancy’s the usual sips of coffee, alcohol, sex, a social life and some gosh darn support. Hearing some nice and complementary comments along the way can really have an impact on your mentality, especially if you’re a (new) mom, especially if you’re like Audrey. If someone asked her, “how are you really?” I think she would have been through the roof.  Since she isn’t getting the back up she needs and deserves from friends, husband or mum, she seeks her own comfort and turns to a mommy group.

Skeptical and feeling uninvited at first, the mommy group, made up of a group leader, three other moms and one dad, become her backbone. Although at first the moms seem to have it all together, Audrey comes to find that everyone has their own troubles and inadequacies. The troop demonstrates different types of parenting techniques, outside family dynamics, personal struggles, tales of their horrid birth stories and experiences of personal mom shaming. As the support grows stronger, unique friendships are formed.

Parenthood, specifically motherhood, is trial and error. Even though I already knew this and am experiencing it myself… it’s still relieving to see Audrey and the other group moms/dad going through the same troubles, self doubt and lack of confidence I sometimes struggle with. I don’t want to see anyone else suffer but it’s reassuring to know it’s perfectly normal.

The Let Down also confirmed that sometimes keeping secrets from your significant other is okay. For instance Audrey goes on a weekend getaway and leaves baby Stevie with clueless Dad. He can’t get her to eat and calls over a couple of moms from the mom group, one of which breastfeeds Stevie. Instantly as the baby latches Jeremy goes “Do we tell Audrey??” And in unison they loudly say “Noooooooooooooo!” Or when Audrey ends up in the wrong group meeting and bumps into her drug dealer friend, but stays because it rejuvenates her sense of self. Or just for the fact that she never mentioned the drug dealer pal until he catches her and her husband fooling around in the car – some secrets are okay and it’s okay to keep somethings to yourself if it’s not hurting anyone. It’s the thrill of the small things I’d say.

The Let Down is funny and a mirror image to real life. The series encouraged me to feel less crazy and more sane. What Audrey came to discover and what I discovered is that most moms always seem so put together. And sometimes we are, but sometimes we aren’t. You should not be afraid to let your emotions show and to feel vulnerable. We’re all in the same boat. We’re all mothers trying to do the best for our children.

You’ll reminisce, you’ll cry, you’ll laugh, you’ll relate. The Let Down will not let you down.

 

 

 

 

People Might Guess I’m A Mom Because __

Mean Girls is one of the prime quotable movies. Am I right? It has an entirely new meaning now though that I can quote the infamous Mrs. George, “I’m not like a regular mom I’m a cool mom.” But hey I am a cool mom! If anything having my Maxly has only made me cooler. Despite reciting Regina’s mom from time to time and aside from the ‘Baby Muggle on Board‘ sticker on my SUV or the glimpse through my tinted windows of the baby car shades – there are a handful of ways to tell that I’m a mommy whether I want you to or not. I don’t try to flaunt the fact that I have a daughter, she just happens to be one of my most proudest creations so it’s inevitable. Those who know me obviously know that, but if you don’t know me, people might guess I’m a mom because —

I’m starting to mix up my baby and my dog’s name. We’ve got a case here of Maxly versus Minnie. Obviously I know who is who but the M’s are making my brain into mush. It’s like I’m sometimes saying their names for the first time, that my friends is mommy brain, or at least I’m going to continue to tell myself that. I’ll be in the backyard calling for my chihuahua Minnie and out comes “Maxlyyyyyyyyyyy.” My neighbors must think I’ve gone bonkers. Or that my four month old is running around the backyard in the rain.

My purse is a pharmacy. Which now doubles as a diaper bag or vice versa. Before I was a mom, before I was even pregnant I was always the mom in the friend group. Anyone had an ache, a pain, needed a tissue or band-aid I was there (wo)man. I still have a drugstore in my bag, and posses anything anyone may need but you’ll see me pull out baby supplies before I can get to my bottle of Excedrin to cure your headache. Travel size baby powder, poop bags, baby wipes, baby oil… the list is endless. But I like to be prepared.

I post at least one picture of a baby who is a spitting image of me daily. Most of my social media accounts are flooded with images of my baby girl but especially my Instagram. Sorry not sorry. If people can’t get on board with my baby pictures spam, they’re probably a monster and I don’t need that negativity in my life, real or virtual.

I no longer put myself first. Nowadays I don’t really do things on my own accord. Sleeping, eating, going to the bathroom, kicking my feet back, watching my T.V. shows… the baby rules the roost in this house. I get it now why Mama Bear’s porridge was cold.

I start my sentences with “This morning on Sesame Street“…… Yep. This is my life now.

I’m not afraid to age. When I was younger I shivered at the thought of getting older, it’s scary stuff. So much responsibility. Adulating is hard. Adulating is tiring. But now being a mom aging is something I’m looking forward to in a way. Yes I’m getting older, my appearances will shift but as the years go on I am excited for the adventures of our family with our baby girl. It really is an entire new chapter of my life. Plus my mom is killing the game with this “getting older” thing. She’s 45 and a MILF, yep I said it. And if I didn’t one of my many guy friends would have said it first.. they always do. And if I do ever start to get down on myself about my age I’ll say what my mom always said as I was growing up and especially now that she’s a grandma, “the kids get older but we just stay the same age.”

I have a baby attached to me when I go out in public. Whether it’s in her baby carrier or her stroller, she’s typically my partner in crime. And I don’t mind. Someone to talk to and it’s no hassle loading and unloading her. I have a lightweight carseat/stroller combo, so taking it and setting it up from in and out of my hatchback SUV takes 30 seconds if that. In the beginning I struggled so much clicking it up from the fold down position. But since I essentially take her everywhere with me, I’m a pro. I’m mastering these mommy things!

I have no shame in any or all of these things that pin point me as a mom. Calling my mom is the most endearing terms, especially if it’s not a regular mom but a cool mom.

 

 

Blooming Baby

Blooming Baby Bath Lotus. Sounds adorable right? Yes. Sounds like a must have right? Okay, yeah I’d agree to that. Blooming Baby Bath Lotus,sounds like absolute heaven for your baby’s bottom during tubby time, right? I’d say so. It sounds like a practical baby item that is certainly worth having. Right? Eh not so much in my opinion. Blooming Baby Bath Lotus for sure makes for some adorable and charming photo-worthy shots. (As you can see below my daughter Maxly featuring her flower.) But it is not an efficient everyday baby item. And I’m all for efficient. I’m usually game for all things baby honestly and all things cute, but when it comes to being functional… that’s a top priority 100%. Before testing this product out for ourselves I spoke highly of the Blooming Baby Bath Lotus to a few new mommy’s that I’ve befriended, but I take my optimism back. I would not recommend this product to anyone. Sorry not sorry.

Being a lover of all things flowers and all things of bright colors, I thought The Blooming Baby Lotus was a baby must have. (Ha-ha on me.) In fact it was one of the first items I had put on my baby registry. Well thank goodness I did that and didn’t spend $39.99 on it myself because I would have been beyond displeased. Let me refrain, I’d be freaking pissed. The lotus is made of a comfortable fabric –plush– but the freaking thing just does not dry. EVER. She bathed in it. I had rung out each petal and the middle four solid times. Hung it up to air dry and went back just over 24 hours later and it was still sopping wet! SOPPING. You’d think it’d be made of a better and competent material such as Nylon or something so it’d dry faster, but no. The company claims you can air dry it or throw it in the dryer for 15 minutes. Well if you don’t have a dryer handy you’d think air drying it would work as they claim, but it doesn’t. This alone just irked me to no end. I’m in a small enclosure and it’s raining outside… so where do I leave the lotus to dry when I need to use the shower?

The other thing too is the lotus has no structure within the petals. So unless you have a very very very tiny sink, the petals just flop to the side and kind of just do whatever they want. As noted previously my daughter just turned four months old, she can’t sit up fully yet by herself so I’d like to lay her down within the flower to bathe her but she’ll still hit her head on the sink. NG as they say in the car business, aka no good.  I’m no inventor or a manufacturer, so I don’t know the solution but I’m sure something as simple as wires within the petals would fix the problem.

Yes the lotus eliminates the need for a plastic tub, or a mesh seat like I use in our tub at home, but I see nothing wrong with what I’m using. My daughter loves it. My idea with registering for The Blooming Baby Bath Lotus was to use it at my mother’s beach cottage in Rhode Island since there is no bathtub there, just a shower. I will continue to use it for a bit though until I figure out an alternative for the kitchen sink there. But as soon as an alternative surfaces out with the flower. The lotus in my opinion is just not cutting it.

I’ve read reviews to see if anyone else was finding an issue with their blooms. One person on the Baby Bloom website said “best thing since disposable diapers.” NOPE. Are these people drinking? Are they even paying attention? The best thing since disposable diapers would be the Baby Brezza (but I’ll leave touch on that at a later date).

“This baby bathtub sink insert is beautiful. But I had a really difficult time using it. I tried it in the kitchen sink (standard stainless steel double sink) where it wanted to fold itself around the baby. The photo shows a baby sitting in it with an adult hand close by… however, I was unable to take my hand off the baby. I had to support his back and simultaneously hold some of the “petals” down. So I tried it in my bathroom sink, which is shallower and smaller than the kitchen sink. The flower wouldn’t fold hardly at all. It kept wanting to straighten out, even with the baby sitting on it” – Phyllis Franklin, Amazon Review. Now this is a review I can get on board with. Wayne J. Roberts also agrees, “I have been using this bath for three months and I am finally annoyed enough to write a review. I was so excited when I ordered this bath, and I really wanted to love it, but I just can’t. This is THE CUTEST BABY BATH ever. That being said, it is NOT FUNCTIONAL AT ALL.” This is why I love Amazon because real people post real reviews versus the Blooming Baby Bath Lotus website which will just share positive reviews.

The thought behind the product is grand. Brilliant in fact. I’ll give you that. But the product itself needs tweaking. And until the Blooming Bath Team improves their lotus I will stand by my opinion and not recommend it to (future) parents.