The Silence of Strep A and Sepsis; PSA

When I was seven months pregnant I came down with a sinus infection and a cold. Even with a Z Pack it took me almost three weeks to feel human again. One of my biggest fears whilst carrying my unborn child was getting sick because I know that your immune system is practically useless when you’re pregnant… but I didn’t realize that same trend carried on after birth as well. But it makes sense. There are so many crazy things that happen in the world and without even realizing it we all kind of think we’re invincible. Yes we know it happens, but it never happens to you. Well the sad truth of the matter is that it has to happen to someone, and when it does the world stops and it hits everyone around them hard – even strangers. So today I want to talk about the silent killer of Strep and Sepsis — to pay tribute to a beautiful wife and mother of three, including a newborn, who this past week was ripped out of her life and her kids life before the blink of an eye.

Lindsay Bugsbee Crosby was a wife and a mother to a five year old and a three year old. She welcomed her third baby a couple of weeks ago on June 24th and on July 2nd she was rushed to the hospital with purple legs. She was in Heaven two days later on July 4th. Heartbreaking.

Backstory: Her son and mother had strep throat and being a new mom with no immune system she unknowingly contracted the virus herself. Think about it… even if she was feeling under the weather she probably attributed it to the fact of just recently given birth. The infection spread directly into her abdomen and uterus since that was her weakest point after having the baby. Her stomach was filled with puss. She had become severely sick with Strep A and Sepsis. She was put into an induced coma with the doctors ready to amputate all of her limbs. Two days later Lindsay passed away. I still can’t even fathom what her husband is going through. What her children are going through, or her family and friends. If I am so upset and distraught over this I can’t even imagine how they all are.

It’s not not often that I share GoFundMe pages but this one is just too important to be passed over. Please give anything you can to this dear family. It won’t replace the loss this family is going through but I’m praying it’ll give the recently deceased mother peace of mind that her family will be taken care of

My heart goes out to these children, her husband, family and friends

Please read her story. She deserves to be remembered and hopefully this tragedy can save a life somewhere down the line.

Hug your loved ones a little closer today every one, and remember if you feel like something is going on in your body, go get checked out. Better safe than sorry.

Running Late Is My Cardio

 

I am on my own schedule but really I am on the baby’s schedule. Our schedule really… which I guess still revolves around her. Whatever works. Lately I’ve been trying to be a boss mom, whatever that means. Through my “soul searching” I’ve realized I need to work on our time management. Well my time management. Growing up I was always taught to be on time is to be early. I was always annoyingly on time. Always. Before I became a stay-at-home-mom my job required me to be there for 7am, so 645am there I am pulling into the parking lot. My boss would get annoyed and say “Jesus Morgan why don’t you come in for 730?” so finally 7am there I was “on time” ready to work. I loved going in and making lists and getting stuff done, I felt so accomplished. Smart man my boss was, tricking me to not be early. Even nine months pregnant and sleepy as could be I would still be early and eager to work.. and managed to get Dunkin on the way. So I have fantastic work ethic and am a freak about time and being late – shoot me. I liked to make the most of my day.

When my baby was born I realized I needed to slow down – physically and mentally, for her and myself. I was still my normal self but family members, friends, my OBGYN all told me to basically take a chill pill. But maybe I’ve gotten to comfortable with that fact?

Most days we’re home but we’re on a schedule (for the most part). Getting ourselves into a routine was the best thing that I could have done for us. Granted days change and life happens. Errands, surprise naps, visiting friends and families, etc. everything can’t be the same everyday. So on days like that… I need to lean towards my old self.. the one who was annoyingly on time. Say we have a doctors appointment or a reservation, that’s different, we’re on time because I feel too nervous to be even one minute late. So what’s different with my family/friends and other things I need to get done? I still like to make the most of my day and feel accomplished but maybe my priorities aren’t in line? But maybe they are?

To be honest (and maybe it sounds like an excuse) but at my old job specifically I was working 60 hours a week. 60!!!! At minimum. There were weeks were I would work over 70 hours, and I was pregnant mind you!!! Since I am no longer working for the time being it’s like I feel like I deserve to sit back and enjoy life. Like it’s okay to really sweat the small stuff. I just want to enjoy my baby, my mom, my new friends, my dog, my cats, my tortoise, my freedom. I want to do things on my own time I guess?

Meeting friends, going grocery shopping, preparing dinner…sometimes I just find the day passing by too quickly and I’m not getting done what I need to get done… at least not as timely as I’d like. I don’t mean for it to happen that way. I swear. I have the upmost respect for other peoples time.  I’m very organized as to where I need to go or what I need to do but I’m not doing too well with my time management.

I’m not even doing much some days but I feel like I’m all over the place. Why? Help?

Love, diaper changes, food, cuddles, sleep, play – babies needs aren’t that difficult. In fact they’re so simple. Now that she’s on her way to being five months old she’s not too unpredictable. But life happens. We get those unexpected spit ups that are in need of an instant change, we get a cranky ass baby who doesn’t even know why she’s cranky but she wants to be left alone. The poops that are so bad that they explode all up her front and her back, pee through the clothes, you know the average baby stuff. It doesn’t seem like much but every set back adds up and by the time I’m done I just feel defeated and want to hang out with my baby, to take it easy. I don’t have the energy anymore to pick up or do whatever else household chore. Am I alone here? Don’t I deserve to kick it?

What I really need to work on is maybe waking up before my baby in the morning so I can get ready or perhaps get things done around the house before she’s up and needing me . But she’s a morning person and gets up early and lucky me, throughout the day she refuses to nap! Although lately we’ve been working on midmorning naps in her crib. We’re getting there! She goes to bed at 7pm on the dot every night…that kid lalalaloves her bedtime. I do too but I need to work on going to bed earlier. But once she’s down for the night is when I get to spend time with my fiance, or read, catch up on my programs, write my blog posts and more. It’s “me” time that I so desperately refuse to give up.

But I need to find a happy medium.

Am I even making sense here? Can any mommas relate? Tips? Advice? Hit me with your best words of wisdom. Thank you in advance, much love all ❤

 

Pregnancy Put My Allergies To Rest

Growing up, come spring and fall, I was the poor kid at recess that had to sit indoors and read a book because I was literally allergic to being outside. Pollen, grass, trees, flowers, I even would get a rash from sunlight – freakish I know. But yep that was me in a nutshell – the girl who is allergic to nature. Constantly congested, bloody nose after bloody nose, and if not blood then a runny nose, swollen red puffy itchy eyes and chest pain. I legit looked like Malcolm (from Malcolm in the Middle) in the episode where he accidentally wipes his face with Poison Oak.

My favorite response when people saw me was “well did you take a Claritin?” Ha these people know nothing. Did they see me? Did they really think I hadn’t tried that? Every ear, nose and throat doctor I saw said I was one of the worse cases they had ever seen. Great. Just my luck right? Every over the counter medicine, most prescription allergy medications, allergy shots, oil treatments… nothing really worked or took the edge off except for Benadryl. And as I’m sure most of you know that stuff knocks you out cold.

Pregnancy does some pretty intense yet sometimes amazing things to your body, aside from the fact of growing and birthing a human. Your bones separate, your internal organs shift around, you have hair loss, stretch marks, and more. What’s even crazier though and somewhat dumbfounds me is that your entire body essentially rewires. Some women claim to have less acne, easier periods and even better vision. Postpartum I’m in love with foods such as brussel sprouts and avocados – which I loathed before. Certain scents of lotion, hand soap or body wash that I was once obsessed with before, now make me sick. I peed like a pregnant person before I was pregnant and now I pee less than ever, what? Unheard of I know. My friend actually has Multiple Sclerosis and when she’s pregnant her MS goes into remission. Zero flare ups and zero symptoms. Pretty amazing yet crazy. Who would have thought? In my case my major rewire was the disappearance of my seasonal allergies. And for that I could never repay my daughter enough.

I actually didn’t even realize it or think anything of it until my sister was suffering from her allergies so bad the other day. She asked me if I was in the same helpless and miserable condition, to which I said no, and she was in amazement that mine weren’t bothering me. Shit. At that point so was I because it’s practically May and they typically start acting up at the end of March. Pregnancy can make seasonal allergies worse or better, you have a 50/50 shot. Thank goodness mine bettered. A couple of months before I became pregnant I went to the allergist and received 33 pricks to test my allergies… every prick that was related to nature turned into an itchy hive almost immediately. It was just a confirmation of what I already knew. I’m allergic to going outside haha. I was pregnant from March thru December last year and looking back in retrospect I was able to keep my windows open, I was able to be outside. I went to a farm, I even picked peaches – activities I wasn’t ever really able to enjoy let alone participate in due to my awful allergies.

Postpartum women are likely to develop an onset of allergies due to an immune system weakness and/or a hormonal imbalance. I was scared that mine would come back and possibly be worse than before…although I don’t think there could be a “worse.” But I think I was finally one of the “lucky ones”. Finally something played out in my favor. Finally! I like to think of it as my own personal reward after suffering so terribly for nearly 26 years and for also birthing my child. Could it be?

Pregnancy can change your body for the better. My neighbor has a cherry blossom tree which is practically in my own backyard. For days now my windows (facing said backyard) have been open 24/7 and I am fine.Not even a hint of irritation to my body. My poor sister and other fellow friends of mine are suffering so bad with their allergies and have been for weeks. It’s amazing and almost unfathomable how I am untouched.

Have you ever experienced minor or major changes after you went through pregnancy/childbirth? Please comment below, I’d be interested to hear.

 

 

 

ABC’s of Motherhood

A- Adjustment. Motherhood is one hell of an adjustment to say the least. You can be as prepared as one is able to be and you still aren’t prepared. Even if their were an instruction manual, there’d be a new edition everyday. You come home with your baby and BOOM there’s a whole entire extra person living in your house. A person who disrupts your beloved sleep, routine with friends, etc. It’s all a learning curve when you’ve got a tiny human who is 100% dependent on you. But it’s all worth it!

B- BabyBrezza. A MUST HAVE if you’re going to formula feed your baby. A life saver in a box. It’s a dispenser that holds water in a tank, formula on the top and mixes your bottles to a ready to feed temperature within seconds just by the push of a button.

C- Crying. There will be lots of crying, mostly from you. Talk about a whirlwind of hormones and emotions, ain’t nothing like it until after you’ve had a baby. Bearing a child turns you into a sap so maybe you’re just sitting there watching your child sleep, crying because they’re so beautiful. Bearing a child also confuses the heck out of your ability to think rationally so the simplest thing can set you off into a fit of frustration… which also leads to crying. It’s all natural. Right?

D- Dysfunction. I plan to give my daughter just enough dysfunction to make her funny.

E- Evenings out. It is so beyond important to have date nights with your hubby or wife. To reconnect and get back to why you even made a baby in the first place, it’s a beautiful thing and always more needed than realized.

F- Friends. Not saying you have to have oodles of friends but you need to get yourself at least one good mommy friend. It makes your journey so much more enjoyable I swear.

G- Gross. Your body does some gross things after birth. Embrace it.

H- Hair Loss. Postpartum hair loss is hella sexy. Enough said.

I- Isolation. Don’t isolate yourself. Don’t isolate your thoughts, fears, and even hopes. Speak your mind and ask for help if you need it. You’ll be glad you did.

J- Jammies. It’s perfectly fine if you and your kid(s) stay in their pajamas all day. It happens!

K- Keep it together. Keep a schedule, keep a budget, keep up with house cleaning. Stay organized! It’s key to so much success.

L- Love. Does this one really need explaining?

M- Mom shaming. JUST DON’T DO IT.

N- No. It’s going to be a word they’re going to need to hear. You’re the boss not them!

O- Opinions. Everyone is going to have them, even when you don’t ask. Just remember you are living your best life for you and your family and unless your child is a rude ass wild child or in danger, just let their comments go right over your head. Screw the know it alls.

P- Poop. So much poop. So many blowouts. It’d be so much easier if sometimes we could just hose them off. Am I right?

Q- Quietness. You don’t always have to be quiet. I assure you they can sleep through anything. Hell I vacuum under my daughter when she’s in her swing.

R- Relax. Don’t be so uptight. I know it’s hard especially right after having the baby because your emotions are so through the roof like I said before but take a deep breath and get some anxiety medication if you need to! It’s ok to balance yourself out and don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.

S- Significant other. Be a supreme team. For yourselves, for your kids.

T- Trust. I know it may be hard but you need to trust other people with your kids. Whether it’s your mom, your best friend, your sister-in-law, you need time away from your baby. It’s good for them and it’s good for you.

U- Ups & downs. As it goes with anything there will be ups and there will be downs. There will be days where you feel like a supermom and there will probably be days when you feel like the worst mother on the planet. Don’t be too hard on yourself, you’re doing the best you can.

V- Videos. It’s so important to take all the photos that you can of your baby but don’t forget to take videos as well! For years to come you’ll want to physically remember their adorable little coo’s and their delicate little moves.

W- Watch your mouth. I’m honestly kind of afraid my baby’s first word might be fuck.

X- Xplanation. Ok obviously that’s supposed to read explanation. Cut me a break.. how many words in the everyday language actually begin with the letter “x”. Never feel the need to explain yourself. No explanation needed. See what I did there?

Y- Youth. Never forget, age doesn’t really matter. You’re only as young as you feel and my moms infamous saying as I grew up was “the kids get older but we don’t.”

Z- Zone in on yourself.  Face it you’re a mom now and your world revolves around your child / family and that’s amazing but don’t forget you need time for yourself as well. It’s the only thing to keep you sane.

Keeping Your Hair Looking Full & Healthy During Postpartum Hair Loss.

It usually takes three months, but it may take 12 months, either way after you have a baby unfortunately your hair dramatically falls out. From what I understand there’s no rhyme or reason and as it goes with everything, everyone is different. I am just over three months postpartum and have been losing hair for weeks now…by the handful. Mind you I have shoulder length hair, styled into a “bob” and have an undercut. I don’t even have much hair to lose. I was determined to not look like I was balding. It’s bad enough that I’m only 25, have excess baby weight, am exhausted like I’m 80 and my hair is now falling out, minus the grays of course. THANKS BABY. Just kidding, I would lose all of my hair for my baby but since I don’t have to, I’m going to let you in on my secrets to keeping my hair looking healthy, happy and full whilst in the mean while it’s secretly falling out.

Keratin. SO IMPORTANT. I’m a sucker for Hask products and have been using their brand for years,. When I found out I was pregnant I switched to a different type and started using their Keratin line. I wanted to get ahead of the game to keep my hair game strong. I have been using their Keratin shampoo and conditioner for almost seven months now, it’s so great. In the shower it’s hard to feel hella sexy because 100+ strands come out per wash/rinse but it’s easy to feel sexy knowing my hair is still actually full and looks “normal” when it’s dry, styled and I’m out and about in public. Acting as the cherry on top, for “double the protection” I also use an anti breakage treatment made by Briogeo.

Keep taking your prenatal vitamins. In my case I take the Women’s 1 A Day prenatal chewy vitamins. Including Folic Acid, Vitamin E, Calcium, Vitamin C and more.. one of the most significant ingredients is Biotin which is widely known to help the growth of your hair and nails. I swear even though my hair is silently falling out, at the same time it’s growing almost twice as fast before due to the vitamins. Thank goodness!

Speaking of hair growth, brings me to my last tip of keeping your hair looking full and healthy during postpartum pregnancy. Keep up with your haircuts. Believe me I know it’s hard to find time for yourself as a (new) mom. But keeping up with hair trimmings is a huge must while dealing with hair loss. It may sound like a double edge sword but it’s not. It’ll prevent your hair from looking lackluster but rather new, fresh and full.

Remember, although it seems traumatic, the postpartum hair loss is temporary but there are ways to hinder that loss so you feel good and as beautiful as ever.

 

 

Why You Don’t Need a Diaper Genie

Way before I was even a parent I knew I never wanted a diaper genie. Heck have you ever smelled one? Even when you have the deodorizers the only time they don’t smell is when they’re empty and even still there’s a lingering stench from the previous full pale. Yes they have a sleek modern look, fitting for any style nursery but you can accomplish the same affect with a (brightly or neutral colored) trash can. And at a much cheaper cost. But what about the poopy diapers you may ask? Simple! You can use recycled grocery or Target bags but in our household we head to the dollar store! At Dollar Tree you can buy diaper disposable bags for yup, you assumed right, just $1.00 a box and each contains 75 bags. Not only are they amazing, convenient and cheap to use at home but they’re even more spectacular to stick in your diaper bag for poops on the go. I do know moms who use and love their diaper genie’s but all of them literally have stated the only time they don’t love it is when you have to open the lid, change the bag or even when there’s a fruit fly infestation. If you have to put up with so much odor why even bother with the diaper genie at all? On What To Expect it states, “You can keep running to the garbage can in the kitchen — and emptying it when the smell gets overwhelming — or you can place a diaper pail near your baby’s changing area. A Diaper Genie will give you the convenience of being able to dispose of baby’s dirty diaper quickly and efficiently while also containing smells (something a regular trash can won’t do).” HA. But it doesn’t contain the smell, ironic huh. Sounds like they just want their money. Yes the product seems amazing but if you’ve ever been in contact with one I bet you’d disagree faster than a cheetah can run. Like I stated before, in our household we use a small 4 gallon pal and throw all diapers in there. The poopy ones are in the individual disposable bags, and we use Hefty 4gal bags which are scented. WIN. No smell, all aspects of the pail are cheap so why go to a diaper genie? You don’t have to.

Why All Moms Need Mom Friends

Work friends.

Family friends.

College friends.

Childhood friends.

All special and important in their own way.

Most recently though I developed a new kind of friendship. One I never realized I craved until I met my mommy mate, my mommy friend. The beauty of a mommy friend is they literally come from all walks of life. Interest wise you can be completely different, appearance wise you can be completely different, and even age wise you can be completely different. So many differences yet one beautiful thing that brings you together on an undeniable basis, motherhood. Obviously not everybody can get along with everyone but it’s important to have an open mind, not to criticize, take an interest in other moms and be nice! Mommy friends are the best because they’ll treat your kid like their own, they get where you’re at on life, your kids will have built in best friends, and so many more perks! In my case I was lucky enough to reconnect with an acquaintance via Facebook. Throughout our pregnancies we would chat here and there, comment on each other’s pictures and then we were lucky enough to have both given birth within 2 ½ weeks of each other. Talk about literally walking in the other’s shoes. You’re never too young for a playdate. And even more importantly you’re never too old for a playdate. We had to get those babies together! After reconnecting and chatting on Facebook messenger for months, her and I decided to finally meet up. Her name is Alysha and she is my mommy match! Our daughters are the cutest little bundles of smiles and it melts our hearts to see them together. Her daughter Stevie Rae and my daughter Maxly are such a hoot.

(Left; Maxly. Right; Stevie Rae.)

At first Alysha and I covered the basics. We talked about normal baby things. “How do they sleep?” “Do they like tummy time?” Etc. And of course we “ooh” and awed” over the cuteness of our two baby girls together. With no time wasted we were discussing their birthdays. The good, the bad, the ugly, the pain and essentially anything a “normal person” would consider TMI. The beauty of someone who just gave childbirth, vaginally or cesarean, you are an open book. Whether you wanted them to or not everyone and their mother knows all about your bodily functions and have seen you from head to toe.. including your insides. Weird I know, but that’s labor! It makes all the difference in the world to be able to talk face to face with someone who just went through the process you went through just weeks before. My fiance, sister and mother described the birth of my daughter to me but they didn’t know how I felt, what it was like from my point of view, Alysha did. Without skipping a beat we dove into the taboo topic of postpartum / postpartum depression. I thought I was crazy. She thought she was crazy. Maybe we’re both crazy but at least we 100% related to each other. To be able to discuss your emotions and hormone levels with a fellow mother who was experiencing the same thing at the same time was a game changer. At this point we’ve hung out handfuls of times in many ways, shapes and forms, but there’s nothing like the feeling after our first get together. I remember I felt so relieved, so connected, so refreshed. She got me. I got her. We clicked. We both knew we weren’t going to be just social friends, but quality friends, mom friends! To be able to have each other’s backs and motivate one another will help us both thrive within ourselves, our friendship, in our relationships and in motherhood. Before having a baby the term “mom friend” irked me. I thought it was lame. But now being a mother and having made a friend that is just like me is one of the most rewarding experiences I could have hoped for. If you haven’t found your mom friend just yet, be patient. There are so many ways to do it. In a large part it’s like dating. It’s just important to network, whether it’s in the real world or the virtual world. Just get yourself out there and get the conversation going.

The Postpartum Package: Hacks for Moms with Hemorrhoids.

The female body is made to give birth, but damn does it still hurt. To most, it’s common knowledge that after vaginial delivery you’ll likely have tearing, swelling, heavy bleeding and stitches. To put the cherry on top, there’s just one more gift you’re blessed with after you just went through endless hours of labor. The notorious taboo topic. The hellish hemorrhoids. No one warns you that the constant pushing and pressure of labor would cause such a war zone in not only your front end but also in your rear. And better yet, how to deal with it once you’re home. So speaking from experience here are five tactics that when combined, will help cure your booty blues.

1. Maxi Pads! I bet you no one told you you’d be leaving the hospital in diapers too? Well maybe not diapers but pads are pretty darn close to it. Since you’ll have to wear them for your bleeding anyway, why not alter them so they can help alleviate the pain as well. On Pinterest I had read that if you unwrap the pads, put Witch Hazel and Aloe on them, then fold them back up and freeze them they were great for bruising and swelling on your vagina. NEWSFLASH, that was one heck of hack! Major pat on the back to whomever figured that one out. But what I figured out is that the padsicles actually soothed my hemorrhoids more than it did my..well you know.

2. Tucks Pads! Before becoming a Mom Tucks Medicated Pads were all I knew to remedy those painful itchy lumps that morphed on your rectum. The cooling sensation does ease the pain and itchiness some but when your Hemorrhoids are the size of quarters or bigger Tucks doesn’t do too much to cure all of your discomfort.

3. Nupercainal! Nupercainal Hemorrhoidal Ointment is a Godsend. And in my experience not a widely known product. In CT it’s never on the shelf in drugstores but it’s always in stock for the affordable price of $9.86 on Amazon! This ointment plus the use of Tucks Pads allows for the burning, itching relief that’s constantly throbbing down there to be somewhat tolerable!

4. The Boppy! For almost my entire pregnancy I had a Boppy pillow that was super soft, flat in the middle but was cushioned on both sides so I couldn’t roll over onto my back or stomach while I slept. Well that same pillow turned into my butt’s best friend once I came home from the hospital. Hemorrhoids make it so painful to sit. At least I had a pretty patterned pillow that I carried around with me for seven weeks versus a bright orange donut that you’d buy at a pharmacy. If you’re gonna be in pain you might as well do it in style. People are already looking at why you’re walking weird, don’t want to draw even more attention to yourself! The Boppy pillow that once helped me sleep heavenly helped me sit so heavenly too. I’m talking on the couch, in the car and even at the Tattoo Shop while getting ink done! Hey no shame in this mommy game.

5. Stool Softeners! Whether it’s Colace or a store brand, stool softeners are a must! Not only do they help with the constipation that labor causes but when you’re ready to make a bowel movement, it makes them nice and soft as not to distress your already tender area even more!

I hope these tips helped someone like they helped me! And if it doesn’t pertain to you then it makes a great care package for a new mommy or a mommy to be!