Work friends.
Family friends.
College friends.
Childhood friends.
All special and important in their own way.
Most recently though I developed a new kind of friendship. One I never realized I craved until I met my mommy mate, my mommy friend. The beauty of a mommy friend is they literally come from all walks of life. Interest wise you can be completely different, appearance wise you can be completely different, and even age wise you can be completely different. So many differences yet one beautiful thing that brings you together on an undeniable basis, motherhood. Obviously not everybody can get along with everyone but it’s important to have an open mind, not to criticize, take an interest in other moms and be nice! Mommy friends are the best because they’ll treat your kid like their own, they get where you’re at on life, your kids will have built in best friends, and so many more perks! In my case I was lucky enough to reconnect with an acquaintance via Facebook. Throughout our pregnancies we would chat here and there, comment on each other’s pictures and then we were lucky enough to have both given birth within 2 ½ weeks of each other. Talk about literally walking in the other’s shoes. You’re never too young for a playdate. And even more importantly you’re never too old for a playdate. We had to get those babies together! After reconnecting and chatting on Facebook messenger for months, her and I decided to finally meet up. Her name is Alysha and she is my mommy match! Our daughters are the cutest little bundles of smiles and it melts our hearts to see them together. Her daughter Stevie Rae and my daughter Maxly are such a hoot.
(Left; Maxly. Right; Stevie Rae.)
At first Alysha and I covered the basics. We talked about normal baby things. “How do they sleep?” “Do they like tummy time?” Etc. And of course we “ooh” and awed” over the cuteness of our two baby girls together. With no time wasted we were discussing their birthdays. The good, the bad, the ugly, the pain and essentially anything a “normal person” would consider TMI. The beauty of someone who just gave childbirth, vaginally or cesarean, you are an open book. Whether you wanted them to or not everyone and their mother knows all about your bodily functions and have seen you from head to toe.. including your insides. Weird I know, but that’s labor! It makes all the difference in the world to be able to talk face to face with someone who just went through the process you went through just weeks before. My fiance, sister and mother described the birth of my daughter to me but they didn’t know how I felt, what it was like from my point of view, Alysha did. Without skipping a beat we dove into the taboo topic of postpartum / postpartum depression. I thought I was crazy. She thought she was crazy. Maybe we’re both crazy but at least we 100% related to each other. To be able to discuss your emotions and hormone levels with a fellow mother who was experiencing the same thing at the same time was a game changer. At this point we’ve hung out handfuls of times in many ways, shapes and forms, but there’s nothing like the feeling after our first get together. I remember I felt so relieved, so connected, so refreshed. She got me. I got her. We clicked. We both knew we weren’t going to be just social friends, but quality friends, mom friends! To be able to have each other’s backs and motivate one another will help us both thrive within ourselves, our friendship, in our relationships and in motherhood. Before having a baby the term “mom friend” irked me. I thought it was lame. But now being a mother and having made a friend that is just like me is one of the most rewarding experiences I could have hoped for. If you haven’t found your mom friend just yet, be patient. There are so many ways to do it. In a large part it’s like dating. It’s just important to network, whether it’s in the real world or the virtual world. Just get yourself out there and get the conversation going.
The Word of Mommy Morgan✨🌿 